Season 5 poster

Season 5

(2009)

Cast

Stephen Colbert as Self - Host
Stephen Colbert

as Self - Host

Episodes

John King poster

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January 5, 2009

Stephen congratulates John King and the rest of the media on getting Obama elected.

Matt Miller poster

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January 6, 2009

Matt Miller says the government must make sure we have basic securities like health care and pensions.

Benicio Del Toro poster

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January 7, 2009

Benicio Del Toro talks about meeting Castro to prepare for "Che."

Lawrence Lessig poster

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January 8, 2009

Lawrence Lessig says the outdated copyright laws have turned our kids into criminals.

Anthony Romero poster

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January 12, 2009

Anthony Romero believes it will be a huge mistake if Barack Obama doesn't close Guantanamo immediately.

Niall Ferguson poster

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January 13, 2009

Niall Ferguson explains how money is a relationship between a creditor and a debtor.

Alan Khazei poster

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January 14, 2009

Barack Obama may be over-marketed, and Alan Khazei wants Americans to volunteer.

David Gregory, Shepard Fairey poster

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January 15, 2009

A look back on President Bush's relationship with the media -- Stephen wonders if tonight's the night they finally do i…

Frank Rich poster

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January 19, 2009

Frank Rich says George W. Bush delivers a message of hope for mediocrity.

Jabari Asim poster

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January 20, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes Washington Post columnist and author of The N Word: Who Can Say It, Who Shouldn't, and Why, Ja…

Elizabeth Alexander poster

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January 21, 2009

Elizabeth Alexander explains to Stephen the difference between a metaphor and a lie.

Jon Meacham poster

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January 22, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes Newsweek editor and author of American Lion: Andrew Jackson in the White House, Jon Meacham.

Chris Mooney, Ed Young poster

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January 26, 2009

Obama changes Bush's policy on science, and Ed Young thinks married people should have more sex.

Philippe Petit poster

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January 27, 2009

Documentary, "Man on Wire"

Paul McCartney, Denis Dutton poster

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January 28, 2009

John Podesta poster

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January 29, 2009

President and CEO, Center for American Progress

Dan Zaccagnino poster

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February 2, 2009

The government collapses in Iceland, and Stephen gets mad at Dan Zaccagnino.

Henry Louis Gates Jr. poster

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February 3, 2009

Henry Louis Gates, Jr. says Abraham Lincoln was always against slavery, but he wasn't a fan of black people.

Steve Martin poster

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February 4, 2009

Actor, "The Pink Panther 2"

James Surowiecki, Jonah Lehrer poster

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February 5, 2009

Stephen salutes the Boy Scouts, and Jonah Lehrer discusses the neuroscience of decision-making.

TV on the Radio poster

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February 9, 2009

Stephen welcomes musical guest TV On The Radio.

Robert Ballard poster

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February 10, 2009

It's tough times for the Republican Party, and Stephen gives a shout out to a former employee.

Eleanor Holmes Norton, Steven Pinker poster

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February 11, 2009

New York Times article, "My Genomic Self"

David Ross, Ed Colbert, Adam Gopnik poster

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February 12, 2009

Adam Gopnik claims that faith and fear no longer rule our lives because of Abraham Lincoln and Charles Darwin.

Father James Martin, Helen Fisher poster

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February 23, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the chief scientific advisor for chemistry.com, anthropology professor and author of Why Him? …

Cliff Sloan poster

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February 24, 2009

Cliff Sloan believes that Marbury v. Madison is significant because it established the rule of law.

John Fetterman poster

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February 25, 2009

Mayor John Fetterman believes Braddock, PA is a great place to spend some of the stimulus money.

Kris Kristofferson poster

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February 26, 2009

Stephen wants to know how Kris Kristofferson can be a country musician and a liberal at the same time.

David Byrne poster

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March 2, 2009

Late at night, who does David Byrne fear David Byrne is?

Mark Bittman poster

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March 3, 2009

President Obama taxes the rich to pay for universal health care, and South Carolina may finally end gun prostitution.

Carl Wilson poster

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March 4, 2009

Carl Wilson tries to understand the popularity of Celine Dion in "Let's Talk About Love" and will NASA name part of the…

Steven Johnson poster

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March 5, 2009

Steven Johnson talks about Joseph Priestley, the man who first realized that plants actually create the oxygen we breat…

Lisa Hannigan poster

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March 9, 2009

Lisa Hannigan sewed the cover, liner notes and lyrics of her album "Sea Sew."

William Gerstenmaier, Dr. Jay Keasling poster

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March 10, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes microbiologist and member of the Joint BioEnergy Institute, Dr. Jay Keasling. Also Stephen tal…

Howard Fineman poster

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March 11, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes Newsweek correspondent and author of 'The Thirteen American Arguments: Enduring Debates that D…

Simon Johnson, Peter Singer poster

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March 12, 2009

Peter Singer urges Stephen to give money to poor people rather than enjoying it himself.

Jonathan Chait, Neil Gaiman poster

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March 16, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the author of 'The Graveyard Book'.

David Grann poster

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March 17, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the author of 'The Lost City of Z: A Tale of Deadly Obsession in the Amazon'.

Juan Cole poster

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March 18, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the author of 'Engaging the Muslim World'.

John McCardell poster

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March 19, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the president of Choose Responsibility.

Derrick Pitts poster

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March 30, 2009

The guest tonight is Derrick Pitts, Chief Astronomer at The Franklin Institute.

David Plotz poster

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March 31, 2009

David Plotz, Author of 'Good Book LP' talks to Stephen tonight.

Dambisa Moyo poster

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April 1, 2009

Author of "Dead Aid", Dambisa Moyo is the guest on tonight's show.

Biz Stone poster

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April 2, 2009

One of the co-founders of Twitter is the guest for tonight's show.

Tom Brokaw, Rich Lowry poster

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April 6, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the co-author of Banquo's Ghosts, Rich Lowry.

Queen Noor poster

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April 7, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes Jordan's Queen Noor.

Phil Bronstein poster

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April 8, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the editor at large for the San Francisco Chronicle, Phil Bronstein.

Bart Ehrman poster

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April 9, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes Bible expert and author of Jesus, Interrupted: Revealing the Hidden Contradictions in the Bibl…

Sunita L. Williams, Susie Orbach poster

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April 14, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes psychotherapist and author of Bodies, Susie Orbach. Also, Stephen talks with NASA's Deputy Chi…

Jim Lehrer poster

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April 15, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the anchor of PBS' NewsHour and author of Oh, Jonny, Jim Lehrer.

Kanishk Tharoor, Doug Kmiec poster

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April 16, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the former head of the Office of Legal Council for both President Reagan and George Bush Sr., …

Ken Quinn, Sheriff Joe Arpaio poster

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April 20, 2009

Sheriff Joe Arpaio denies that he focuses too much on illegal immigration.

Coach Mike Kryzewski poster

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April 21, 2009

Tonight Stephen talks with Duke University men's basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski.

Ira Glass poster

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April 22, 2009

Tonight Stephen talks with host of This American Life, Ira Glass.

Elizabeth Bintliff poster

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April 23, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the West Africa Program Officer for Heifer International, Elizabeth Bintliff.

The Decemberists poster

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April 27, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes musical group The Decemberists.

David Gross poster

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April 28, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes journalist and author of 'Dumb Money: How Our Greatest Financial Minds Bankrupted the Nation',…

David Kessler poster

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April 29, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes former FDA commissioner and author of The End of Overeating: Taking Control of the Insatiable …

Jonathan Alter, Ethan Nadelman poster

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April 30, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the founder and executive director of the Drug Policy Alliance, Ethan Nadlemann.

J.J. Abrams poster

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May 4, 2009

The Prescott Group needs a bailout, and J.J. Abrams reveals clues to Stephen's Persian Gulf mystery.

Cliff Sloan, Paul Rieckhoff poster

Cliff Sloan, Paul Rieckhoff 0.0

May 5, 2009

Cliff Sloan believes that Marbury v. Madison is significant because it established the rule of law and Paul Rieckhoff w…

Laurie Garrett poster

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May 6, 2009

President Obama's approval numbers are at 67%, and public health expert Laurie Garrett is here to shed some light on th…

Mitchell Joachim poster

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May 7, 2009

It's Bring Your Savior to Work Day, and Mitchell Joachim wants to build carbon-neutral cities.

Jeff Daniels poster

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May 11, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes actor Jeff Daniels Also, Stephen talks with the vice president of policy at Demos.org, Tamara …

Ron Howard poster

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May 12, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the producer & director of Angels & Demons, Ron Howard. Also, Stephen talks with the head of L…

Michael Pollan poster

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May 13, 2009

Tonight Stephen welcomes the author of In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto, Michael Pollan.

Yusuf Islam poster

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May 14, 2009

Donald Trump allows Miss California to keep her crown, the DonorsChoose competition continues, and Yusuf performs.

Meghan McCain poster

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May 18, 2009

Meghan McCain loves the Republican Party and wants to save it from the people trying to make it more extreme.

Walter Kirn poster

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May 19, 2009

Republicans find a way to make us love them again, and a Difference Maker stands up to the government.

Seth Shostak poster

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May 20, 2009

Torture memo author John Yoo gets a newspaper column, and Nancy Pelosi says the CIA lied to her.

Green Day poster

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May 21, 2009

Stephen reveals most of the Indian election results, and Green Day talks about their album, "21st Century Breakdown."

Jeffrey Toobin, Sen. Byron Dorgan poster

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June 1, 2009

Republicans could lose their Latino voter, and you can see Stephen's Persian Gulf destination from Sarah Palin's house.

Katty Kay poster

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June 2, 2009

The FDA challenges medical claims made by Cheerios, and Jim Moran protects kids from erectile dysfunction advertising.

Eric Schlosser poster

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June 3, 2009

California allows some gay couples to stay married, and Obama invites Iran to celebrate 4th of July.

Dag Soderberg, David Byrne poster

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June 4, 2009

Wikipedia takes on the Church of Scientology, and the latest on abstinence-only education will be worth the wait.

General Raymond Odierno poster

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June 8, 2009

General Ray Odierno steps up to the plate to be Stephen’s first guest in Iraq.

Specialist Tareq Salha, Sgt. Robin Balcom poster

Specialist Tareq Salha, Sgt. Robin Balcom 0.0

June 9, 2009

Stephen welcomes Sergeant Robin Balcom and Specialist Tareq Salha to his international desk of wisdom and truthiness.

Lieutenant General Charles Jacoby poster

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June 10, 2009

Tom Hanks and Stephen prepare a care package, and Charles H. Jacoby Jr. picks his favorite soldier.

Stephen broadcasts from Iraq, Command Sgt. Major Frank Grippe poster

Stephen broadcasts from Iraq, Command Sgt. Major Frank Grippe 0.0

June 11, 2009

George W. Bush praises the troops, and Frank A. Grippe orders his officers to sing the Army song.

Austan Goolsbee poster

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June 15, 2009

Stephen gives advice to the next leader of North Korea, and asks Austan Goolsbee if his arm gets tired from throwing mo…

Karim Sadjadpour, Jim Rogers poster

Karim Sadjadpour, Jim Rogers 0.0

June 16, 2009

According to polls, 120% say the Iranian election wasn't rigged, and Jim Rogers wants to reduce Duke Energy's carbon fo…

Joshua Micah Marshall poster

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June 17, 2009

Sonia Sotomayor belongs to an exclusive women's-only club, and Joshua Micah Marshall won't be doing the pointing and ta…

Paul Muldoon poster

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June 18, 2009

Someone finally agrees to accept Gitmo detainees, and Stephen nails poet Paul Muldoon.

Simon Schama poster

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June 22, 2009

Stephen suggests punching randomly until we find the enemy among us, and Simon Schama writes a history of the future of…

Howard Dean, David Kilcullen poster

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June 23, 2009

David Kilcullen fights wars by taking a local approach to combat smaller guerrilla movements.

Matthew Crawford poster

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June 24, 2009

The Jonas Brothers don't abstain from making awesome rock, and Matthew Crawford believes in working with his hands.

Jim Fouratt poster

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June 25, 2009

ABC turns their network over to Barack Obama, and Jim Fouratt meets the leader of the gay shame movement.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson poster

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June 29, 2009

Neil deGrasse Tyson tries to make science accessible to whomever wants to reach out and touch it.

Alexi Lalas, Kevin Mattson poster

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June 30, 2009

Stephen questions whether America should embrace soccer, and Kevin Mattson thinks Jimmy Carter was underappreciated.

Nicholas Kristof poster

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July 1, 2009

The Supreme Court takes its recess, and Nicholas Kristof discusses "It's Time to Learn From Frogs" after crossing five …

Ed Viesturs poster

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July 2, 2009

Congress passes a renewable energy bill, and climber Ed Viesturs scales Stephen's ego.

Paul Rieckhoff, Paul Krugman poster

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July 13, 2009

The Sotomayor confirmation hearings begin, and New York Times columnist Paul Krugman knows a lot about money.

Leymah Gbowee poster

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July 14, 2009

Stephen suggests looking for change in the folds of Barney Frank, and asks Leymah Gbowee where Liberia is.

Douglas Rushkoff poster

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July 15, 2009

There's bad news for people with target-shaped birthmarks, and Douglas Rushkoff lets Jews and Freemasons off the hook.

Edmund Andrews poster

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July 16, 2009

Stephen is emotionally dead inside, and Ed Andrews should write about teen vampires if he wants to get out of debt.

Geoffrey Canada, Bob Park poster

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July 20, 2009

Geoffrey Canada can't find any area where white men are being disproportionately victimized and Bob Park doesn't unders…

Dr. Aaron Carroll poster

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July 21, 2009

Stephen will be the mighty oak when he investigates Acorn, and Aaron Carroll believes America should have a single-paye…

Matthew Waxman, Chris Anderson poster

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July 22, 2009

The truth behind the CIA's secret assassination squad is revealed, and Chris Anderson talks about a future economy wher…

Zev Chafets poster

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July 23, 2009

The British announce plans to cut and run, Tom Vilsack drops out of the presidential race, and Zev Chafets angles for a…

Movits! poster

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July 27, 2009

A report on tasers may shock you, and Swedish band Movits! helps Stephen put his Ikea futon together

Arianna Huffington poster

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July 28, 2009

Arianna Huffington was born in the United States, but she cultivated an accent to give herself an air of being an ethni…

Kevin Baker poster

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July 29, 2009

Lance Armstrong comes in third in the Tour de France, and Kevin Baker says Obama is the new Hoover.

Kathryn Bigelow poster

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July 30, 2009

Kathryn Bigelow's war movie, "The Hurt Locker," is getting great reviews, despite not having explosions and ear-splitti…

General Anthony Zinni poster

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August 3, 2009

President Obama finds a way to pay for health care, and General Anthony Zinni will wax Stephen's chest.

Kurt Andersen poster

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August 4, 2009

According to Kurt Andersen, the economic and health crises give Americans a brief chance to get things where they want …

Kris Kobach poster

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August 5, 2009

Kris Kobach wants to fight illegal immigration on the local level and reward the people willing to come to this country…

Meryl Streep poster

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August 6, 2009

Stephen reviews the movies that are destroying America and talks to Meryl Streep about her role as Julia Child.

Sen. Barbara Boxer poster

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August 10, 2009

Vladimir Putin returns to the spotlight, and Stephen interviews Barbara Boxer with deaf suspicion.

Jonathan Cohn poster

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August 11, 2009

Afghanistan prepares for Bring Your Rocket Launcher to Work Day, and Jonathan Cohn explains why America's having a heal…

Mark Johnson poster

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August 12, 2009

Americans speak Glenn Beck's mind at town hall meetings, and Mark Johnson spreads peace through music.

Mark Devlin poster

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August 13, 2009

Glenn Beck loses his sponsors, and Mark Devlin uses giant balloons to life telescopes to the edge of space.

Bill McKibben poster

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August 17, 2009

Reporters get so desperate they'll even work for a newspaper, and Bill McKibben lowers carbon dioxide levels by not exh…

Robert Wright poster

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August 18, 2009

Ang Lee poster

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August 19, 2009

Ang Lee captures the hope and optimism of tired, dirty kids in his movie, "Taking Woodstock."

Chris Matthews poster

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August 20, 2009

The Earth's population nears 7 billion, and Chris Matthews discusses his documentary, "The Kennedy Brothers."

Cory Booker poster

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September 14, 2009

The health care debate rages on, MTV's VMAs deliver a shock, and Cory Booker admits he is the mayor of Newark.

Christiane Amanpour poster

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September 15, 2009

Christiane Amanpour is going to make Americans care about the rest of the world with her CNN show "Amanpour."

Tony Danza poster

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September 16, 2009

Obama indoctrinates America's school children, Tucker Carlson reveals Muslims' influence on textbooks, and The Flaming …

Frank Bruni poster

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September 17, 2009

Stephen resurrects the U.S. military technique of staring at a goats and Frank Bruni talks about mastering his addictio…

Tue, Sep 22, 2009 poster

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September 22, 2009

The Senate votes to allow guns on trains, and Shai Agassi wants us all to drive electric cars.

AJ Jacobs poster

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September 23, 2009

AJ Jacobs' life experiments include following all the rules of the Bible, trying to be the most rational person alive a…

Ken Burns poster

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September 24, 2009

The Republican Party is accused of racism, another holiday is under attack, and Ken Burns makes a documentary about nat…

Sheryl WuDunn poster

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September 28, 2009

Sheryl WuDunn believes giving women loans and educating girls is the way to lift developing nations out of poverty.

Matt Latimer / Out Of The Closet poster

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September 29, 2009

An exciting new tobacco product hits the market, and Matt Latimer recalls his Bush speechwriting days.

Wed, Sep 30, 2009 poster

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September 30, 2009

Stephen has an update on his space treadmill, and he'll evolve Richard Dawkins' book into tiny shreds of paper.

Francis Collins poster

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October 1, 2009

Francis Collins informs Stephen that it's going to take time for stem cell research to give him crab claws.

Arne Duncan poster

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October 5, 2009

President Obama proposes a longer school year, and Arne Duncan could only get a job as a secretary.

The Mountain Goats poster

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October 6, 2009

The Mountain Goats perform "Psalms 40:2" from their album, "The Life of the World to Come."

Alison Gopnik poster

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October 7, 2009

Doctors invent a radical new surgery, and Alison Gopnik says babies can help us understand deep philosophical questions.

Thu, Oct 8, 2009 poster

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October 8, 2009

The media attacks Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh may buy a football team, and Colin Beavan makes no environmental impact.

Shashi Tharoor,  Dr. Sanjay Gupta poster

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October 12, 2009

Stephen takes on Norwegians for giving Obama the Nobel Peace Prize, plays tennis with James Blake and talks zombies wit…

David Javerbaum, Sylvia Earle poster

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October 13, 2009

Stephen posts Twitter updates on Miley Cyrus, talks fetuses with David Javerbaum and asks Sylvia Earle why he should ca…

Amy Farrell, The RZA poster

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October 14, 2009

Stephen gets angry over health care reform, discusses obesity with Amy Farrell, and talks wisdom with the RZA.

Jerry Mitchell poster

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October 15, 2009

Stephen proves that mayo is the illest condiment, asks Jerry Mitchell what a newspaper reporter is and unveils his new …

Cornel West poster

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October 26, 2009

Stephen criticizes Washington State, endorses your job application and disagrees with everything Cornel West stands for.

Tue, Oct 27, 2009 poster

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October 27, 2009

The Catholic Church reaches out to former members, and Gail Collins talks about the modern American woman.

Brian Cox poster

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October 28, 2009

Stephen finds out what broke the largest particle accelerator and preps for his interview with Brian Cox by watching "B…

Bill Simmons poster

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October 29, 2009

Stephen talks to Rosanne Cash about torturing detainees with music and discusses "Teen Wolf" with Bill Simmons.

Nicholas Thompson poster

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November 2, 2009

Stephen sponsors the U.S. speedskating team, analyzes Arnold Schwarzenegger's breakfast and disputes the end of the Col…

Andrew Sullivan poster

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November 3, 2009

Stephen makes history with the U.S. Speedskating team, covers a gay couple's arrest on Mormon Church property and wants…

Harold Evans poster

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November 4, 2009

Stephen declares Barack Obama the loser, gets dunked in water by Al Gore and asks Harold Evans if he's going to be a ch…

Thu, Nov 5, 2009 poster

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November 5, 2009

Stephen puts Canada on notice with Joey Cheek, introduces Vaxaconda and talks to William Bratton about McGruff the Crim…

Mon, Nov 9, 2009 poster

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November 9, 2009

Stephen asks Mike Castle why he can't marry a chicken, helps Katherine Reutter win a gold medal, and talks art with Tho…

Maria Shriver poster

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November 10, 2009

Stephen defends Barney Frank for not recognizing marijuana, enjoys a Taser XREP ad and feeds ice cream to Maria Shriver.

Christopher Caldwell poster

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November 11, 2009

Stephen believes bankers are God's representatives, criticizes "Sesame Street" and asks Christopher Caldwell where the …

Woody Harrelson poster

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November 12, 2009

Stephen uses Miracle Whip money to buy mayo, claims Lou Dobbs' audience and shaves Woody Harrelson's head.

Mon, Nov 16, 2009 poster

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November 16, 2009

Stephen shows Barack Obama how to greet foreign leaders, offers to sing in Aerosmith, and discusses architecture with P…

Malcolm Gladwell poster

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November 17, 2009

Stephen talks to Marc Kielburger about child labor, skateboards with Jackie Speier and asks Malcolm Gladwell to explain…

Norah Jones poster

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November 18, 2009

Sarah Palin has a 400-page book, "2012" takes the world by storm, and Norah Jones talks about her famous father, Indian…

Thu, Nov 19, 2009 poster

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November 19, 2009

The Senate introduces a tax on plastic surgery, and Elvis Costello plays "Cheap Reward" with Stephen.

Dan Esty, Cevin Soling poster

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November 30, 2009

Stephen talks to Dan Esty about global warming, forces Joseph Cirincione to play "Sanction, Bomb, Marry?" and compares …

Tue, Dec 1, 2009 poster

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December 1, 2009

Stephen profiles a made-up district, discusses alien Jesus with Guy Consolmagno and helps Sherman Alexie save part of w…

Wed, Dec 2, 2009 poster

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December 2, 2009

Stephen critiques President Obama's speech, presents a device that lets him poop whenever he wants, and questions Craig…

Thu, Dec 3, 2009 poster

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December 3, 2009

Stephen covers Tiger Woods' car crash, tries out for the U.S. skeleton team and talks to Janet Napolitano about the col…

Mon, Dec 7, 2009 poster

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December 7, 2009

Bill T. Jones describes how Fela Kuti fought against the Nigerian government with his music.

Senator Bernie Sanders, Andy Schlafly poster

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December 8, 2009

Stephen gives Bernie Sanders a chance to address the vicious socialist rumors and discusses the best of the public with…

Wed, Dec 9, 2009 poster

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December 9, 2009

Stephen appeals to the monkey demographic, gets a visit from Krampus and calls out Goldman Sachs with Matt Taibbi.

Thu, Dec 10, 2009 poster

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December 10, 2009

Stephen details Russia's battle plan for Afghanistan, tries out for the U.S. bobsled team and puts words in Lara Logan'…

Snoop Dogg poster

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December 14, 2009

Stephen interviews President Obama's cardboard cutout, signs Katherine Reutter's thigh and pre-censors Snoop Dogg.

Alicia Keys poster

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December 15, 2009

John Slattery sells gold, Stephen relays the story of Treesus, and Alicia Keys performs her hit song.

Tom Brokaw poster

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December 16, 2009

Stephen encourages Tiger Woods, sees the ghost of Stephen King and remembers the wacky decade with Tom Brokaw.